When I got pregnant with Blake at 19, I don't think the timing and circumstances could have been any worse. I was in my last year of college, about to get my degree in teaching, living at home, worked part time (but did make really good money), and in a relationship where "dad" was about to leave for school out of state, not to mention that it was the most unstable and unhealthy relationships ever! Nevertheless, I knew I had to keep the baby... the moment I found out, it was instant love and "getting rid" of "it" was like getting rid of one of my limbs. The pregnancy was easy in the beginning... then "dad" left for school and so began my vendetta to make him and ultimately myself, suffer! At 24 weeks, I began preterm labor and found myself at the hospital every other day to stop contractions, on bedrest, and admitted 3 times... eventually giving birth very early at 28 weeks. Luckily, Blake was healthy, just needed some fat on him to leave the hospital! I wonder if I was the one who caused all of the problems or if it would have happened regardless.
Anyways, so with this pregnancy, things are completely different. I have a great job, doing what I love, making great money, have enough financial stability to last the rest of my life, will have a brand new house very soon, have a healthy son who can make anyone laugh and has the most sensitive heart of any kid I know, and have a wonderful MAN in my life who adores me, would do anything in the world for me, who takes care of me more than I ever took care of myself, and SO much more. Here I am at 36 weeks, just about full term, and even though it was a tough pregnancy, I feel blessed for what I have. Would things have ended up this way if my circumstances were similar to before?
